This is a topic which has been in conversation for centuries. Women have accomplished so much over the years. We have a made history and I know we are ready to develop equality in the present and the future. As a feminist this is a topic which is close to my heart. Growing up in a predominately male household I learnt from a young age how to get my voice heard around men. Not only that but I had/have an extremely strong mother as a female role model. My male siblings and my Dad have always understood what is wrong with the current condition of 'equality' and I'd go as far to call them feminists themselves.
Over the years I've realised that we as woman get labelled with such negative words in order for others to try and suppress us. SOME of the words I've come across are:
Psycho
Weak
Crazy
High maintenance
Sassy
Emotional
Temperamental
Girly
Gossip/Bitchy
Hysterical
Bossy
Toxic
Soft
Overreactor
Crazy
Women get labelled with these words when men feel threatened by them. It is used in a way to mock women and look down on them. Notice how some of these words aren't even negative? Yet they are used in a negative way? Take 'emotional' for instance, this is not a negative word. It is good to show your emotion and have emotional intelligence. It is strong to show emotion. However... the SECOND you put 'too' in front of it and call someone 'TOO emotional' it instantly becomes an insult. And isn't that ridiculous?
From an early age boys and girls are put into stereotypes. Boys are told:
"Don't run/throw/kick like a girl"
"You're such a girl"
"Don't be such a girl"
"You scream like a girl"
'Girl' is used as an insult. How is that okay?
Coming back to the word 'emotional'. We never say "Wow, you have the emotional intelligence of a girl" because although this is a huge compliment, SOMEHOW it still sounds like an insult and this is because we are comparing a male to a female and this offends men.
We get put into two categories
Men are strong and emotionless
Women are weak and emotional
Showing emotion and being vulnerable does not make you weak. It makes you very strong. So why are these so mixed up? When men talk about their feelings they are told to "grow a pair" and "don't be so weak". Think about the effect this has on men. And yet we wonder why men have such struggles with their mental health?
Women get told they are 'too sensitive' (notice how that word 'too' is used again) and when we show emotion or talk about our feelings we get labelled as 'crazy' or 'psychos'. We get told we are 'overreacting'. This is something that personally frustrates me because the word 'psycho' has become such a universal word deliberately used to offend woman. Which is why the word PSYCHO is a word I deeply dislike. Encouraging words never seem to be used to describe woman. Why is that? Boys tell their friends "stay away from her, she's a psycho" all because we opened up about how we felt and you couldn't handle it? Isn't that sad. All that is doing is pushing men further and further away from feeling able to open up about THEIR thoughts/emotions. Because why would they open up, when they see this is the kind of response women receive?
Because women have so many aspects/characteristics (which should be seen as a positive) people think it's an excuse to criticise MORE parts of females. We receive so many comments/phrases about our appearance just because others see them as a negative. Some of these are:
"Her boobs are small"
"She's too loud"
"She's frigid"
"She's easy"
"She has loads of cellulite"
"There's nothing of her"
"Her nose is so big"
"Her lips are small"
"Her tummy looks like a pregnancy bump"
"She wears too much make up"
"Her muscles make her look masculine"
"I don't like her body shape"
"She's too pale/dark"
These comments have a severe impact on peoples mental health because they cause low self esteem and make us insecure in ourselves. We seem to live in a time where we are so critical of each other. Yet do you notice if you are given a 'compliment' from a boy they are usually sexual?
As a feminist I know improvements are being made, we are making an impact but theres still more to be done. I understand that some will think the world is getting 'too sensitive' and soon we wont be able to open our mouths without offending someone. All I ask is that people think about the words that they use to describe others and is it a kind word? Hopefully you can learn to use this in your day to day lives.
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